AN EXPERIENCE!!

Both the previous posts of mine were more of my thoughts and less of experience..so this time I decided to come up with an experience of my own…

Isnt it true that all of us worry over even the slightest problems? Well.., “ALL” of us may not be so but am sure that majority of us fall in to that category.. I am going to explain a small experience of my own regarding such an issue….

The issue was about a placement oppurtunity which fell on my way very unexpectedly. I wrote a bank recruitment exam and it was a suprise even to me that I received call letter for interview. I am doing my bachelor’s degree (now final year) and most of the people who wrote that exam with me were post graduates (although the minimum qualification required was +2 pass). So naturally the victory got in to my head and I began to weave dreams. If I get through the interview ( and it was said that interview was merely a procedure and if we pass the written exam it is almost sure that we get placement) I wil hav the merit of gaining a central government job at the age of 19.

I made a very detailed preparation to go for interview. New clothes,chappal,other accessories everything. Also I read numerous books and newspapers so as to be “updated” about the latest happenings.

On the interview day I reached the place almost 1 hour before the stipulated time with my mother. I comfortly placed myself in the waiting room. Within half an hour the waiting room was full of candidates. The girl who sat beside me took interest in talking to me. She wanted to know my name and also asked what I was doing. From my dressing and all she guessed that I was working already and asked “so..were are you working now?”. I replied tht I am not working but is a student but didn’t give any further explanation as I did not wish to reveal my age. Then I asked her if she was studying and her answer was “no,I completed my M.Sc and B.Ed and is not looking for job”. I said “ok” . Then came a guy,smartlooking and since there was no other set available,he placed himself next to me. And no sooner did he took seat than he started talking.. he too made a mistake guessing that I am a working woman and I corrected it. Also I learned that he was “doing MBA after completing his M.Com”. Also he said that “I qualified the prevoius written test also and appeared for the interview but didn’t get through it”.

These were all plain hints to me by the loving god that “this is not for u” ,but yet I didn’t take them so and assured myself that “I will get through”. I was very confident when I appeared before the board and answered all the questions they asked.The board members let me go with a good smile on their face.I felt that they treated me as a child and the questions were not very serious but only very informal ones.They wanted to know about my hobbies (when I said I like reading and cooking, one of the board member laughed merrily and asked me what dish do you know to make.. I took that question seriously and answered that I make almost all homely dishes and was suprised to see that he didn’t believed me at all.But what I said was true and I was taken to cooking in the early years itself by my mother who thought it is a must for a girl to know the basics of cooking).I came back from the interview chamber with a smiling face and my mother was very happy to see that.

Also my hopes were very high because I answered all the questions they asked (on my subject of study,on recent political developments, on banking etc.,) and I was almost dead sure that I am going to get posting..

Months passed by after the interview.I had classes in the college and I was worried about what to do if I get posting soon (it was said that the order would come within 2 or three months and we will have to join immediately).The idea was that to take medical leave from college,complete probationary period in bank and then take leave from bank and complete my course.Day and night I was thinking about the job only…what should I do with my first salary (even I decided the colour of the first saree that I am going to buy for my mother!! ) .

Daily I would visit that banks site to see if the result was published.And after 2 months filled with sweet dreams, THE RESULT CAME!! I entered my roll no to see the result and the answer given by the site was “SORRY! Your name is not in the list of successful candidates. Thank you for the interest shown in our organization. You may try in the subsequent recruitments.“

Can u imagine my mindset then? My dreams… everything vanished in a second.. A tear or two rolled down my cheeks. I saw the result this Friday night (03/07/09, 11.30 pm). As it was late night I didn’t had to inform it immediately to my family members.I went to bed.The dreams came to my memory even if I tried to forget them.I didn’t get sleep at all.I felt like crying.. I woke up and turned on the light.. my plan was to hear some music so as to get away from that mood.. when I put the light, I saw a book lying on my table.. it was a autobiograohy of a saint (An Autobiography Of a YOGI by paramahansa Yogananda) ..i always enjoyed reading it. I simply took that book and opened, the page I got was page no. 115 and it had a line which was underlined in red by someone (it was a library book). The line read “IN SHALLOW MEN THE FISH OF LITTLE THOUGHTS CAUSE MUCH COMMOTION. IN OCEANIC MINDS THE WHALES OF INSPIRATION HARDLY MAKE A RUFFLE”.

Another shock!! I didn’t turn on the music system but went to bed again.. the next thought came to mind was about that line.. Yes, the commotion was created by my mind. I got interview call.,yes true but who told that it means I am going to get job at such an early age? I saw that all the other people who came for interview were much much qualified than me. All of them had more rigth for that job than me. For many of them,the age was up and it was the last chance for them to get palced. God lovingly told that fact to me through that MSc BEd girl and that Mcom MBA guy. But I simply did not listen. I dreamt a lot and put myself in trouble.


These thoughts provided a good insight for me.. “YES!! My heart was shallow and hence it got caught in commotion at this small thing.. lots of oppurtunities lie open for me but I was blind and was about to cry at this simple thing..” and I got answer to the very question which was hurting my mind “if god didn’t mean to give me job,then why did he planted ray of hope in my heart by giving interview call? “ the answer was “he did so because he wanted you to develop your mind from being shallow to being oceanic which will be calm ,no matter whatever good or bad comes your way”.. I had read that book (and that sentence) twice or thrice but never took that sentence that seriously but only took a passive interest in it. But now it became imprinted in my mind as one of the precious lessons of life….

I thought of writing this here because I thing this wil inspire you too to discover the answers which god says secretly to you through various incidents in the life..
So be alert.,


Next time if something happens in your life and you think it as “incidental”.. do think twice.. may be it is speaking silently some thing god wanted you to know…